Historically, one might say patience is not my greatest virtue. Pretty much my whole entire life people have been telling me to slow down. Sometimes I accidentally jump many steps ahead. I like things big, briiiiiight and fast. Sometimes a touch jolty so I really feel alive. Recovering massive risk-taker over here. While I promise myself to always keep leaping, I intend to do it with more stability underneath my wings from now on.
When I do slow down, it’s like the Universe laughs at me and sends in a little more weight so I have to move even slower than that. Wtf. I tell myself it’s like Soul Cycle, add the resistance - receive additional support and it will take you straight through to the sweet spot. If you let it.
What I'm realizing is that the restorative effects of relaxation don’t happen if we only physically slow down but stay overactive in other areas. That’s choosing the noise. It’s not the point. Easy to think you’ve let go and wound down when your body is there but it’s a deeper practice to tune in to how the other stuff keeps running and discover real turning off. True slowing down is settling into empty, open space. Total non-resistance. Allowing all that is. Letting yourself be guided into each next moment - not forcing or controlling. Open-ended trust. Not conditional trust.
Kim, my spirit animal, one of the many gifts you’ve showered upon me is this saying, “Patiently impatient.” It’s like, know what you want and hold the space for it while allowing it to take as long as it takes because you trust there is no rush when you flow with Divine timing and you are all good and totally happy exactly where you are with all that currently is.
Ummmm - EASIER SAID THAN DONE.
And, absolutely crucial for “growth mode” as my guy George Mumford puts it.
Patience is the key. Gotta let it all alchemize. Don’t rush through it. Grow through it. Elongate while in it. Think like a yoga pose.
It’s easy to do when things feel good. It’s those damn challenging moments that require we really turn up the volume on cultivating inner peace. Not rushing things creates a healthy space for the pieces to come together and things to land. When we can say “Yes” to the unknown, shit usually turns out better than expected. It does mean you have to be down with free-falling taking as long as it needs to take. And as Danielle McCleerey says, “We don’t get to decide how long healing takes.” So, we can freak out - or we can choose to dance while suspended in air.
The moments that I authentically believe my own spiritual mumbo jumbo are glorious, and I feel like I am Queen of the world. The moments that are drastically not that, I fake it ‘till I make it. Occasionally, faking it is a positive thing :)
Here’s what I’m learning about practicing patience while staying open to whatever is meant for me and being cool with moving on from everything that’s not:
The George Mumford way works - He says, “Embrace everything that comes up and choose the glass half full perspective. Look for the lesson. See what’s in it for you. Pick love over fear. This is the growth mode lens.” If we’re gonna patiently chillax in it, might as well get the gifts.
Whatever helps you let go and relax - I mean yes, there’s an art to to this tip. Don’t go overboard on the stuff that’s bad for you. Don’t fear taking the edge off either. Find what works best for you which in my opinion is whatever lights you up, gives you energy, and nourishes your soul. What uplifts you and offers you confidence. After, you typically feel more balanced and that you’ve received something. Not anxious or drained. It doesn’t cause you to drag. If it drains you, say no thank you. But also, it’s all good when you do say yes please to all that. It’s the grace and compassion we give ourselves that matters most. Everything in moderation including moderation.
I love being right here - Say this 222 times in a row and then eventually you’ll believe it. Seriously though, intentions & affirmations are potent tools. And I am truly grateful to be right here - ALIVE. Safe. Healthy. Happy. As someone who used to always reach for more before I truly received what’s already available to me (see, skipping steps), I often have to remind myself to fill up with the basics. It’s enough and it’s plenty <3
Maybe it’s not about starting over maybe it’s about opening up - Like, how can I become more expansive right here and soften into all that is - emotions, perceptions, relationships, etc - instead of misbelieving I need to throw it all away and begin again to get it right. Instead of misbelieving I need anything to be different to be enough, worthy, or deserving. One of my repeating patterns that I’m having the opportunity to transform is blowing everything up, running away, and completely rebuilding from a place of fear and lack. Patience is teaching me how to sit in it, expand into it, and allow all of it. To ground and allow is the name of the game.
With all of this said - keep fucking dreaming! Go for it all. Use the down time for you. Go all the way in on yourself. Keep believing in yourself. That doesn’t need to mean anything specific. Just keep doing you. Keep choosing you. Keep “Showing up fully to whatever is showing up for you” As earth angel Angie Banicki likes to remind me. <3